One Loss of Heart 



Copyright July 1999

This is my very first attempt at fan fiction. You have been warned. :-)

Chapter One

Methos stood at the window, arms braced against the wall, watching the sunlight fade. He closed his eyes and let the music weave its way into his spirit. Her voice whispered against his mind like dark velvet. Each note, each word echoed, like an angel sighing. 

'You tell me there's no darkness While the sun shines down on you And just because your life is peaceful There's no crying left to do For every cup that runneth over Many more are filled with pain You talk to me of sunshine When it's pouring down with rain' 

The song finished and the CD advanced to the next selection. The ghost of sadness haunted her words. 

'There will be no songs of love There will be no sweet refrains There will be no sweet good byes No slow walks in the rain There will be no whispered words No vows that can come true There's only me here Waiting forever for you.' 

The Ancient Immortal looked at the photograph on the back of the CD. A young woman stood in shadows, small and slender with long dark hair. Her head bent down, her eyes hidden from view. Somehow Methos knew those eyes would be colored with sadness and grief. Her music spoke of love found and then lost. A solitary figure in the darkness with aloneness as her only companion. Anastasia. He felt his eyes grow moist as he continued to listen to her words and music. Why was she so hauntingly familiar? 

As the CD ended, he felt a gentle hand touch his shoulder, pulling him into a warm embrace. His lover from the Highlands hugged him close and bestowed a tender kiss upon his cheek. He allowed himself to be turned around, a large hand lifting his face up, brushing the silent tears away. 

Mac gazed at his friend, seeing the strong emotion in the hazel eyes. He took the CD from Methos' hand. 'Anastasia. Her music brings a feeling of melancholy to your quickening. I can't quite fathom why you enjoy her music so much.' 

Methos turned to look out at the encroaching darkness. 'Her music speaks to the empty loneliness of my past. I hear her tears; I have cried those tears.' 

Mac joined him at the window, gathering the older man against his body. 'For someone so young to write such words of sadness, of loss; her life must have been touched with tragedy.' 

He looked down at their entwined hands. Matching gold bands encircled each of their left ring fingers. A simple gold band set with a solitaire emerald, surrounded by small diamonds. 'May that tragedy of loss never touch us. Tonight we celebrate one year together. A year filled with trials and tribulations. A year filled with the love and joy of discovery. A whole year together. I never thought . . .' The Highlander bit his lip and looked away. 

Methos gripped tightly the hands that held his. 'I know. You never thought we'd make it this far.' 

He could feel the slight tremor in his lover's body. Methos slowly turned, reaching out with both hands to bring the younger man's face close to his. He searched Mac's brown eyes, seeing the unspoken concern. 

'I realize that you have had to live every day with the fear of me leaving. I'll be honest with you; there were days when the panic overwhelmed me and all I wanted to do was to run and shut myself away from all these feelings.' 

Mac laid a gentle hand on the older man's chest, guarding the ancient heart with that simple touch. 'I believe in you, Methos. It's the blackness of your past that scares me. You've been alone for so long. What is it about me that would hold you to our love?' 

Methos' eyes glowed with love and tenderness. 'It is your trust and total faith in me that has brought me out of the darkness of my past and into the light. When you hold me close the nightmares and the fears lose their power.' 

Mac's hand tightened protectively over Methos' heart. 'I will always try to be there for you. I love you and will treasure our friendship forever. Even if one day you decide that you need to leave.' 

Methos closed his eyes. The Highlander's honest emotions overwhelmed him. He fought against his 5000 years of mistrust. It was so hard to let his guard down and admit how deeply he cared. And he did care. He loved this man more than his own life. And he understood that Mac needed to hear the words. 

'Know this, Duncan MacLeod. I love you and I pledge my commitment to you and our relationship. Remember this.' Methos covered Mac's hand where it lay against his heart, his own touch sealing the promise to his friend. 'Remember this always.' 

The gentle caress of fingers brushed across the Scot's mouth as the young man sighed deeply and leaned forward into the warm touch of his soulmate. Brown eyes met their hazel counterpart. No more words were necessary. A promise had been given. 

The Ancient Immortal smiled, a lopsided grin brightening his serious features. 'Damn! Have I gotten sappy or what?' 

Mac laughed and gave his friend a quick hug before releasing him. Going to the fridge, he grabbed two beers and tossed one to Methos. 'Old Man, that was pure unadulterated mush.' 

Methos took a long swallow from his beer as he expertly flipped the cap long distance to fall behind the fridge. 'Mush? I'll have you know my performance just now was worthy of an Oscar. Definitely worthy of a magnificent anniversary celebration. Hint, hint.' 

Mac sat down on the couch to read the newspaper. 'You can hint all you want. I've already told you we're going to Joe's tonight. And batting those long eyelashes at me will not get you any more details. Some secrets are just worth keeping.' 

A much loved and listened to artist would be performing at Joe's tonight. It was through Joe that he had met Anastasia. He couldn't wait to introduce Methos to her. 

Methos let out a pitiful sigh, which of course the Scot ignored. Seeing that he would get nothing more from Mac, he walked over to the entertainment center, removed the CD from the player, and placed in back in its container. 'Mac, have you seen the liner notes for this CD. I can't find it anywhere. I want to see if the words to the songs are on it.' 

'Hmmmm? I'm sure it's around here somewhere.' 

Mac held up the newspaper so that Methos could not see the knowing smile on his face. That missing item would not be found soon. He had forgotten it at the jewelers. Looking down at the ring on his finger, he recalled how he had decided on an anniversary gift for his lover. The cover of Anastasia's CD had been a photo of a man's wedding band resting on black velvet. A plain gold band with a small solitaire emerald. He had added diamonds to the design.

Mac groaned softly as he remembered the lovemaking that had followed the giving of the gift. Slow and tender, filled with quiet touches of passion. They had fallen asleep still physically joined together. Upon wakening, they had found their left hands clasped together in an unconscious demonstration of their bond. 

An elegant sprawl on the couch next to him brought him back to the present moment. A long lean hand entwined itself into his long hair, removing the tie. Dropping the newspaper to the floor, he closed his eyes in bliss as those magical fingers began a gentle massage of his scalp. 

The moist haven of a mouth warmly closed over his lips, capturing and claiming him in a hard demanding kiss. Never loosing contact with that maddening mouth, the Highlander moved to cover his lover's body with his own, strong legs wrapping around slender hips. Teasing kisses deepened as his body joined in a sensually erotic dance with the Ancient Immortal. The fire of passion ignited and burned hotter with each fervent touch of lips, fingers and bodies. The bond between them fueled their desire, weaving their love tightly, binding together their hearts, their souls. 

Soft cries and moans tangled together in the silence. Trembling hands removed the barriers of clothing before continuing in their explorations, touching freely. Increasing hunger dictated the escalating rhythm of their bodies. Control fragmented as waves of pleasure slammed against them. Struggling for air, heads were thrown back as bodies strained against each other trying to unite them in perfect oneness. Bathed in the blue light of their joined quickenings, thoughts dissolved as the ecstasy of release ripped through them. 

Mac relaxed the death grip Methos had on their hands and pulled his lover's body into a gentling embrace. Touching softly, he slowly caressed the tenseness from the older Immortal's body. Tremors could be felt in the slender frame as the Highlander laid gentle kisses across the older man's face. 

'I love you Methos. 

'And I, you, my Warrior of the Highlands.' 

End Chapter 1

Lyrics from UB40 and Chris Isaak used without permission.

Chapter 2